The Something Awful Forums are probably the best place on the Internet to be a jerk, so I honed my asshole-craft there, along with thousands of other sarcastic nerds. After I graduated high school, I couldn’t get away with being a jerk in person anymore, so I resorted to being a jerk on the Internet. Also, check out that radical duck, he'll fuck your sister.Long before my genius was discovered by Zack Parsons and his amazing web-A&R skills, I spent most of my free time being a jerk. Wow, I found a cake that says "David" AND "2"! I'm a genius. I’m going to give you a non-boring retrospective of stuff you’ve probably never read!
However, since I’m generous and charitable and I love my readers, I am going to indulge you with something weightier than that. Under these circumstances, most lazy internet hacks would leave you with some kind of boring retrospective of stuff you’ve already read. It also just so happens that it’s my birthday, and I don’t feel like doing any actual work. It just so happens that today is the two-year anniversary of the venerable institution that is Your Band Sucks.
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